An actor's dreams and doubts Advent Calendar proudly presents: December 11 - Tamara Richards from Canada who is now back in Montreal but has lived in Cardiff, London, Amsterdam and Cape town. I think I could have coffee all day long with Tamara without getting bored a single time :-). The word is her's:
Inner Child
Advent calendars used to be one of my favourite aspects of Christmas. Not that we were in any way religious, but it was all about the chocolate. Growing up with only one sibling made it even better as we simply had to alternate between odd or even dates and all that chocolate would be mine. MWAH. I would run down to the kitchen in the morning, eyes wide in anticipation all excited about which date we were on, what would my door be, the donkey, a wise man? I would try and judge by the size of the door how big the chocolate would be. What I didn’t realise is that my sister had other plans. She would wake up before me, sneak down to the kitchen, open up my “door”, steal the chocolate and carefully place the doors back together so that I wouldn’t notice. Oh the pain, anguish and frustration I would feel each time I would flip open a door only to find it empty.
As I have recently discovered, that excited, frustrated, angry child still exists. During my years of suppressed emotions, trying to be a responsible adult believing that it was unhealthy to be too emotional I lost my inner child. I tried growing up but it just didn’t work for me. However, for various reasons the child is back and I’m keeping her around!
Pursuing my acting career back in my hometown has opened the door to my childhood, to the emotions that I once felt and made it easier to tap into again. Just like the advent calendar, what is behind the door is unknown but I am still excited by the thought. Many acting coaches refer to recapturing the inner child that we once possessed as a way of freeing ourselves and opening up to the multiple layers and aspects of our personalities. Spending time with my parents, walking by schools I once attended, seeing people that have known me since I was 8, has allowed me to recapture my youth. Acting was always my first passion so to return to the place where it all began is very fitting. I can once again be a child, be truthful and most importantly be in the moment.
I didn’t buy a chocolate advent calendar this year but I still plan on getting excited on Christmas morning with all the presents under the tree, frustrated that my father isn’t listening to me, angry that my family is so spoilt while most of the world has very little and then forget it all and go and make snow angels
p.s. I have forgiven my sister, but love to tell her kids the story.
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| December 11 |
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