I survived even though my voice was gone, I had a fever. A few hours before the show one of the slippers was still not done and I had to embroider that last tulip for the scene. Cristina met me at the station to help me carry my bags.
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| Props in the making |
Sometimes being sick and even hangover helps when performing. Not too sick of course but sick enough not to worry about all those thoughts that normally chaos my head the days before a show. Thoughts like: Will I manage? Why do I put myself up to this again and again (even though I know the answer)? Is it good enough to be put up on stage (according to my own standards)? Will I manage to get passed that passage in the text where I always get lost? Last minute arrangements stress me out normally.
Sickness beats the nonsense out of me but it also kills the nerves. And I need those nerves to be on top of my game.
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| Cristina and me in The Stronger by August Strindberg |
The show is over. We had our last performance last night. Debby Mulholland our director did great and so did all of the actors and many people in the audience were impressed by what they saw. It has been great fun working with everyone.
Looking back at my own performance. The second night went better than the first because I had more energy. I didn't reach perfect, but it went well. Oh come Lina, some would say, you did great!! Thanks for that. It's just that I know what it feels like when I am there 1000% and I always aim for that. That is what motivates me. That is what keeps me going. I am not beating myself up about the fact that it wasn't perfect. It was good. I had a lot of fun. I am very happy that so many people came to watch us. Now I am looking forward to start my next project.
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| Amélie and Ayca preparing backstage |
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